The Chosen One

why me?
why?
damn ns
why did you choose me?
i hate you...


Tahniah! 921105106503
SAMUEL CHEW PAK KHEONG
terpilih menyertai PLKN
Siri 7/2010

tahniah they say...
do i look like i want to be congratulated for being chosen to go to ns?

500 000 17 year olds in Malaysia
100 000 get chosen for ns
and i'm one of them
lucky me....

The Hitler

yo wassup people?


guess what?
i got something to show you all




tadah?
gazi + nazi = well...gazi
or ghazeh as i like to call him

and he's actually more evil than hitler (cue lightning bolt)


i did this some time back and i wanted to share this to the world
(don't laugh at my photoshopping skills)
(kino i know you are laughing now..stop laughing)

what did you say?
you don't know who gazi is?
he doesn't look that evil to you?
well good thing you told me this
cause now i can help you

gazi evil fact 1) he eats baby seals for breakfast
gazi evil fact 2) he pushes old ladies into traffic
gazi evil fact 3) he doesn't belanja you when you ask (the monster!)
gazi evil fact 4) he's name is gazi...how much more closer to nazi can you get?
gazi evil fact 5) have u seen the way he looks?? if that's not evil i don't know what is


so when gazi achieves total world domination and takes over this galaxy
don't say i didn't warn you
cause i did
remember that face
you'll be kneeling before it in 10 years time
C.I.A, if you guys are reading this.....help us!

what did you say?
you scared shitless?
well good thing you have me then..
cause now i can help you

Ways to survive the Gazi Event (or G-day)
1) none

yes, you heard me...
you will not survive G-day
you have no hope
so you might as well give up now
and join us

yes, i said us
you see..preparing that list on how to survive G-day made me realise
that there is no hope for humanity
thus i started kissing up to gazi
and joined him as his right hand man
MUAHAHA!!


now would be a good time for you to start kissing up to gazi
before he start, you know...taking over the world

what did you say?
you haven't start kissing up to him yet?
you're going to start tomorrow?
well i'm sorry for you then
cause gazi the almighty has already started
gazi the almighty is kind
gazi the almighty is righteous
gazi the almighty know all and sees all
gazi the almighty is not watching me rite now
help me!

look outside the window
he's watching you
be afraid...
be very afraid
there is no hope for you
or your family
or your friends
or your cat
you can't escape the inevitable
so run away..
run far far away
run to another planet for all i care
you still can't escape
there will come a day where you will face him
and then you will realise the true horrors of
THE GHAZEH!

*ps. if you are a nazi/hitler fan, this post was not meant to offend you in any way..please don't kill me
**ps. if you are a gazi, this post was meant to offend you in everyway possible...please don't try to kill me...because you'll most probably fail

sorry gazeh! =D

The Block

writer's block
can't think of anything to blog about
haiz....
so just wait till i get inspiration

(yes, i know this is a useless post)

The Theory

before i start, let me first say that i do not believe in my theory at all
i just got too bored
and i am NOT a racist


Sam's Theory of Skin Colour
(or S.T.O.S.C for short)

When men was first created, everyone was white (i'm talking about American/British white)
when they died,they went to hell
in hell they got slightly burnt and tanned
then they got sent back to earth
as a Chinese
when Chinese people die, they get sent to hell again
got burnt + tanned and then sent back to earth
as Indians
Indians die, go to hell
get more burnt and tanned
and come back to earth as africans
and when africans die.....

they go to heaven
thus meaning heaven is full of africans

but wait, it doesn't end there

after years of living in heaven,
the africans start to become fairer
eventually getting whiter and whiter
untill they're skin colour is same as white people

and thus they're sent back to earth
and the cycle is repeated


that's my theory
make sense no?

and once again, i do not believe in my theory
so please don't send me any hate mails
saying how i'm a racist pig
because i'm not

of Fire Drills and other useless stuff

Ahh, PJ. Good, Fun, Reliable PJ.
The best and most fun way to spend 2 and a half hours in school
So why is it that some moron decided to hold a fire drill 10 mintues into my PJ?!
I mean, come on! We haven't had PJ for almost 2 months now
10 minutes into our first PJ class in 2 months and suddenly a freakin' loud alarm start ringing
and we're all having the WTF expression on our faces
so we're all forced to go down to the field (in the hot sun)
and line up according to our class (in the hot blistering sun)
and sit in the mud (in the freaking hot blistering sun)
yes.
sit in the mud ( in the freaking hot blistering sahara desert-like sun)
what is this? a detention camp?
and did i mention the the sun was freaking, blistering sahara desert-like hot?
and to make our day brighter
we get some pms-ing fireman shouting at us for not lining up in a straight line
(like that's gonna matter if the school's really on fire)
and we get smoke blown into our faces and lungs
not exactly the best way to spend PJ eh?
but at the end of the day, the whole thing gave me 5 things
1- muddy shoes
2- a darker tan
3- heat stroke
4- a bad mood
and 5- inspiration


inspiration for what?

to create a list of useless stuff that we deal with in our life

so here it is


SAM'S LIST OF USELESS STUFF WE DEAL WITH IN OUR LIFE
(or S.L.O.U.S.W.D.W.I.O.L for short)

1) fire drills
2) penalty points
3) surat amarans
4) Pn.Caroline (sorry teacher)
5) add math
6) monthly tests
7) photo frames you got as gifts
8) that t-shirt that's too small at the bottom of your cubboard
9) our f4 and 5 chemistry text book (seriously, have you read the thing? it doesn't tell you anything)
10) my blog posts
11) watches (tell me how often do you look at your phone for the time rather than a watch)
12) pirated computer games/ps2 games/dvds from Summit that doesn't work
13) pas kebenaran keluar class
14) the papan kenyataan at the back of the class (the one with all the subjects)
and other stuff that i can't seem to think of at the moment



(yes i know this post is late...but who cares?)

Stuff I Did This Holiday

*deep breath*

went to lumut,perak with family.spend 3 hours trip to lumut listening to metal songs.went swimming at the beach.went swimming at the pool.played archery. played basketball.played ps2 till 2 am for 3 nights in a row.learnt to play pool.learnt to kayak.learnt to fish.failed to catch any fish.wasted time trying to catch fish.spend 3 hours trip home from lumut by listening to metal songs.watch movie with cell mates.went to sunway with friends.watch movies with friends.laugh ass off during movie with friends.play pool with friends.eat carls jr with friends.go for tuition.play dota.practise drum.practise guitar.stay up late every night.watch tv.spiked my hair.went for g2!.watched another movie with cell mates.go to church.play with my doggies.listen to heavy metal songs.sleep.eat.breath.shit.and waste shit loads of time doing absolutely nothing.


that's about it

on another note: i really really don't wanna go back to school.
but it's not like they're giving us a choice
so SMKKK, here we come

Friday The 13th!

Holy Shit!!
i just realised that today is friday the 13th!!
and thanks to wikipedia i now know that there is such thing as a "friday the 13th phobia"
and its called....
wait for it...
triskaidekaphobia

this day was generally regarded as the most unlucky day of the year
until it became really common
most of us don't even notice that it's happening

but for me, it kinda became one of the best days of my life

but for most people, it's still unlucky
especially if u live in Crystal Lake
where Jason Voorhees is probably right behind you
about to chop your head off
good luck with that!
(god it sucks to be you right now)

*chop * hack * slice *